Strategies for Overcoming Regret and Self-Sabotage
When you make a big mistake it can be very scary and hard to navigate a path forward. Rather than taking a deep breath and letting the events of the day end with nightfall, we have a tendency to put the moment on replay over and over again. Years later we find ourselves still haunted by old mistakes instead of learning from them. It is time to release yourself from these moments rather than being defined by them.
- How to Recognize Bad Habits that Have Become Patterns
Have you ever noticed a certain pattern in your life that continues to repeat itself. For example, you keep meeting the same person, but they are in a new body. You keep ending up in the same types of places but in different cities. You keep ending up in the same type of situation no matter how many changes you try to make. This points to you being the catalyst. Identify what it is that you are doing that is attracting the wrong attention or situations.
2. Journal and Be Transparent and Authentic as Possible
One of the best ways to avoid repeating the same mistakes is recognizing when and how you keep making the same mistakes. Journaling is a therapeutic way to deal with your wrongdoings. Evaluate yourself honestly. If you noticed that people keep responding the same way to you in certain parts of your life, for example, friendships and close relationships, it is time to examine your actions in friendships and close relationships. Painting an accurate picture of yourself each day also helps you to see where you need to grow or where you have grown.
3. Forgive Yourself, then Forgive Others
You will only be as forgiving to others as you are to yourself. When you habitually forgive yourself, you allow yourself to give grace to other people to. Forgiveness also makes it easier to combat the urge to wallow in bad habits. When you are constantly reminding yourself, this is not who I am anymore, you will begin striving to make different decisions. It doesn’t matter if you are the source of other people’s pain, or others are the source of your pain, forgive yourself for the decisions that led you to that place.
4. Be Intentional in Creating New Habits
The only way to shift away from bad habits is to create new habits to replace them. Deciding that you are going to choose something different requires practice, not simple words. Create a plan of attack on how you plan to shift your habits into new habits that serve you well.
5. Own Responsibility for Your Actions and Stop Blaming Other People, Places, and Things
Hiding behind a victim mentality to avoid responsibility for your actions will not serve you well. Out of everything on this regimen, this is the one that will keep your stuck in your bad habits the most. When you will not take responsibility for your habits you will never truly resolve them.
If you are going to spend time dwelling on your past, let it be time well spent intentionally creating a plan to create a better future.